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Sunday, July 15, 2018

A Walk In The Park II

Here are some photos that I took that I am quite fond of. Part 2













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Saturday, July 14, 2018

A Million Suns

I, remember of a time,
of when the people,
played and danced so gracefully,
they forgot the moments,
of which they wished they died. 

Truth, is stronger than the rest.
It's stronger than, the sign of hope, 
it's glimmering,
with stars that are greater than the sun. 






Remember me

Friday, July 13, 2018

Tiny Spaces







The Poem Tiny Spaces came out on 4/10/12 But did you know I made it into a song? Here are the lyrics and with little changes it is one of my most favorite songs to play. I hope you like it!



I live my life in a swimming pool,
whenever I awaken.
I try to be a respectful man.
These eyes are getting sharper. 

I find myself place to place,
spend the nights in a gutter.
What will I do for you?

If I'm always on the move?
But if I wait for you.
How long will I wait for you?    

You can’t tell me what is life,
I don't know this Jesus Christ.
It will come to me,
in tiny spaces.

You can’t tell me what is wrong,
you weren't there when I was brought.
It will come to me,
in tiny spaces.

But I can wait, for you.
If I cant what could I do?
But if I wait for you.
How long will I wait for you. 

I walked myself to a toxic dive,
my peers are getting worried.
I saw someone in the corner and cry
poor thing looked so sorry.

I asked the garçon who's that friend?
"His last name is Draper."

What will I do for you?
If I'm always on the move?
But if I wait for you.
How long will I wait for you?    

Said it seems like everything is wrong,
but I don’t know what’s going on. 
It will come to me,
in tiny spaces.

I lived my life in someone’s hands,
there’s some things I don't understand. 
It will come to me,
in tiny spaces.

You can’t tell me what is life,
I don't know this Jesus Christ.
It will come to me,
in tiny spaces.

You can’t tell me what is wrong,
you weren't there when I was brought.
It will come to me,
in tiny spaces.

There's nothing I won't do,
If it gets me closer to our rendezvous.
I just need something to get me through.
I will live my life now, just to be with you. 









Remember me

Thursday, July 12, 2018

Parturition

War. 
War with one .
War with everything you compromise.
To see through your blue eyes.

Time.
Time is done.
The moment you can't count time.
Oh your done.

The mutation it's gone to far.
Everyone I hear has had enough.
Packing my things it time to relive.
All the innocent lost when we had.

Parturition.


Why?
Did it have to be me?
As if my disease felt I deserved,
what it did to me.

My abomination,
Come home
I will do anything for you.

Will you come forth,
with how little I try.
Forgive my health and,
help me deal with. 

Parturition.

We have tried a thousand times,

Still there's no signs of life,

When will we be in the clear,

My mind always causes the fear,







Remember me



Wednesday, July 11, 2018

A Walk In The Park Part I

Here are some photos that I took that I am quite fond of.















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Tuesday, July 10, 2018

A Poets Realization of Numbness

Life sometimes changes for the worst or the better. It doesn't matter which other than the fact it changes. I've lived a whole life scared of the unknown not knowing that the unknown itself was what I was scared of. Unknowing the unknown unwillingly. 

But this is what I do know. It’s been a while since I looked in the mirror and looked at myself and truly questioned myself. Why am I this way? So I did just that. I looked at myself and acknowledged my crooked smile and my fractured state of mind. I wish I was healthy both mentally and physically and I couldn’t help but think that does anyone? I doubt I am alone but maybe everyone has this realization. Maybe everyone is afraid to look at themselves in the mirror and no I am not talking about that look you give yourself as you wash your hands. To truly look through the skin and the hair and wonder what makes you, well you. 

I was drunk one night and this has been something I have been doing less and less as I get older. I looked at myself in the mirror and I didn't quite know what it was but something was off. I looked no less than I do currently—sober—yet something was uncomforting about my appearance. I looked closely to my face and I could visually see that I was numb though I looked exactly the same as I do everyday. I looked into my soul and I realized that this is in fact what I didn't want to be. I felt uncomfortable in my shoes on how I looked at myself and I felt ashamed at what I had done. I saw the true me. Trying to keep the demons at bay by self medicating through alcohol. I was alone when I looked at myself and I told myself that if I was to drink again, I would not do it to numb my senses to keep my overbearing thoughts away but to have fun and bond with my friends. 

Drinking alone ruins you. Drinking to feel less will destroy you. Drinking to run away from something will demolish you. Pick up a new habit but always acknowledge that when you replace a addiction, it gets replaced with another. Theres things we like and things we don't like. Do the things you like that wont destroy you or make you depressed when you look at yourself. 

When I started this blog I didn't like who I was. You could see it in my writing but I kept writing. It made me feel good. People read my thoughts and they liked them. They complimented my poetry or my writing and thats why I came back. I was lost chasing other things that didn't really matter to me. Writing poetry. Writing music. Drawing, taking pictures. Art. Thats how I express myself and I don't have to do it drunk or stoned or any other way that involves a unclear mind. When you see someones release, compliment it. Comment or like it or whatever you want to do to give acknowledgment to the creator. “This got me through a hard time and you made me see the light.” This is what I want to see. I would like my followers to vocalize their likes and dislikes more. Do it on my blog if you have to. My blog still has room to grow and if it involves people becoming the best human they can be, then do it.       


My name is Corey Rhodes and I want to change the world.







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Monday, July 9, 2018

Never Let Your Fear Decide Your Fate






Starting a new series called notable lyrics. In these pieces I will present to you some of my most favorite lyrics in popular music. 

Oil pastel, Ink 











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Sunday, July 8, 2018

The Garden Of Pneuma

In the garden of Pneuma.
Monsters search for,
all the weakest, 
links in sight.

Fire and brimstone,
run the halls.
Of what the, 
people did consume,
one day

And I,
am Falling on my knees now.

Are we,
going to make it through somehow.
One day.

I'm wishing for peace now.

And I,
am falling on my knees now. 

Then,
the king of Dermas,
brought with him, 
a gift of faith but,
treason too. 

Come with me.
He said we will,
be joined together,
in one.

Pneuma the people,
joined with him,
to execute his final plan.

They lived together,
for some years.
Till the Dermas,
closed it eyes.

The ones in Pneuma,
spoke among. 
They talked of the ones,
that they loved.

They were wishing for peace now.

They're wishing for peace now.

Some like never.
Some like best.
You know you can exist.

Someday maybe,
others do.
I can't keep my eyes off of you.

I wish to feel you,
and smell your love.
I can't believe it's done.

One day maybe, 
in years or more.
We can join our hands again.



Remember me

Saturday, July 7, 2018

Abstract Photos

Here are some abstract photos I took a while back. 
























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Friday, July 6, 2018

Stinging Green

You make me love like stinging green. 
Try to hold on to what you need. 
I can’t stop or I’ll never know. 
I need this time to try and grow. 
I feel worse than the liars

Ever make you wonder what it’s like,
to move through this mess and be alright?
I feel like you know what to do.
Just put up or shut up is just what you do. 

I always wonder if I’ll see the light again.
Searching for something like a friend,
It’s always put up or shut up,
you act like you do. 

You make me love like stinging green. 
Try to hold on to what you need. 
I can’t stop or I’ll never know. 
I need this time to try and grow. 

You make me love like feral rain. 
You try to dry off to ease the pain. 
Wait in the house,the ceilings stained.
Looks like the rain found a way again. 
I feel worse than the liars. 

Turn on the television it won’t stop,
the volume is to loud or is it my thoughts?
I try act like I do, this meeting is old. 
I can’t stand living down this road. 

You never know when seeing your friend,
Will be the last so let’s make ammends. 
Never go to bed angry that’s what my father said. 
It’s put up or shut up, it’s just what you do.

You make me love like stinging green. 
Try to hold on to what you need. 
I can’t stop or I’ll never know. 
I need this time to try and grow. 

You make me love like farrell rain. 
You try to dry off to ease the pain. 
Wait in the house,the ceilings stained.
Looks like the rain found a way again. 

You make me love like nicotine 
Makes me worse off than it seems. 
Open your eyes I wish to be seen. 
I just want to live life and be clean. 
I feel worse than the liars 




Remember me

Thursday, July 5, 2018

Oceana



Oceana released as a poem on 9/25/11 It became a song and is also inspiration for a short story or novel that I have been writing for some time. I was able to make a good recording of it and accompanied it with a slideshow of some of my pictures. I hope you like it.



Down in the wake.
She cries.
down by the beach house,
waving goodbye.
You wept, of what you missed.
Dream what you want.
Dream what you wish.

I can see everything,
you have in your head,
cuz you are dreaming.
I can see everything,
cuz im your friend.
People and friends arent sleeping,
but you don't see it.
I can see everything,
you have in your head,
cuz you are dreaming.

They came, down on me.
Why, cant you see.
They all claimed that you were dead,
then it all fell down on my head,
when all the planets collide,
you just stand back and lie,
this is what I hear you say.
Goodbye, 
goodbye.

All the lions came out,
and the fires subside.
Time to look at me now,
with shadowy eyes.
So do I look like im mad?
Cuz all i ever wanted was for us to be happy.







Remember me

Wednesday, July 4, 2018

The Lamb of the Slaughter

Ben Lamb, Ben Lamb,
Find your way to cure them. 
Abhorrent and rotten,
is what’s left of our skin. 
From the deepest of oceans. 
To the darkest of rooms. 
Ben Lamb, Ben Lamb,
We’re waiting for you.  

Ben Lamb, Ben Lamb. 
We’ve been waiting for you. 
It seems like a century,
since we heard of you. 
Are you a martyr or a prophet,
or something even better?
Ben Lamb, Ben Lamb,
we’ve never been deader. 

Ben Lamb, Ben Lamb.
What do we do?
We’ve been searching for years,
for someone like you. 
We heard from our fathers,
that you will fix or afflictions,
raise the dead, 
and quench our addictions
Ben Lamb, Ben Lamb.
Please come by and stay,
we don’t believe there is another way. 

You’ll never find peace,
with the name you were given. 
You’ll never find peace,
with a name like that. 

You’ll never find peace,
with the name you were given. 
You’ll never find peace,
with a name like that. 




Remember me

Tuesday, July 3, 2018

Twilight Forest







Heres a little painting I did. Its not a original painting but this was my take on it. 





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Monday, July 2, 2018

Letters To The Mind: Death


How many times do you need to wish you were dead? To bash your head into the wall, and wait for that sweet tune till you realize that by the first time you did it, you already died.


     
  Feeling some sense of relief thinking that all our lives will soon end I can only ask, have you ever wanted to die? Of course you have, everyone has wanted wanted to die at one point at another. Whether it be over some mellow dramatic event or over something totally serious. It even could have been as a joke verbally, but at one point or another we as a people wonder what is the point of our life and if it is going nowhere then that same individual contemplates his or her own end.

     Im not going to be ignorant, of course I feel this way right now. I'm only writing about it right now because I have that feeling in the depths of my soul at this very second that makes me want to continue. As if waiting to see what is behind the other door. Its the anticipation of what could happen because when everything is said and done, whether if you believe in a afterlife or not, the feeling of not knowing ends. I feel that that is the difference of life and death. Living is not just a bodily function that acts in reaction to everything else, it is a feeling, a mental function, a emotion, it is the very definition of itself which disables peoples understanding and comprehension but i'm not saying i'm a philosopher that knows any unanswered questions, this is just what I feel and what I believe.

     Theres this, thing, has been apart of me for so long. It tore me up and left me my remains, and that is me now. But there is nothing I really can do, its something i cant resist. It eats up my insides, and it makes me cry, It makes myself see what I really am. I feel that when people look at me, look at my writings and they can only think that I am chronically ill, but I know others who can only help to think that I'm the only light in the darkness of society, one of the few beings that can offer a feeling that calms the soul. Torment tears apart your will to stand for everything you believe but you look at it slowly, examine everything with a concentrated steadiness and you finally realize that its like everyone is dying. That everyones issue is that they want to be miserable because they know this depressing fact and they don't know why but it has always been written in their genes.

     So you blame your family, you blame where you live just so you can feel better so you can forget that your dying. There is a reason why it is called a mental condition and not a emotional condition. You can change your emotions telling yourself your mad at a event but your mind stays with you if you want it to or not. As if that depression, anxiety, OCD is not virus. They aren't a condition they just come as a side effect with an already present condition and that is to live, to have a mind to create ideas. To create people even worlds with the intention to just see what could happen because the very purpose to live is simply to live. From the very second we are born, we start to die. It will happen eventually but the anticipation is when. So we live in reaction to the knowledge of our dying bodies and wait for something to happen in our lives and we wait for death. Its like we are all dying slowly because we are.

     Then death comes, as swift as a knife to the back it whispers into your ear and a sense of self becomes perfect, you don't regret anything and life ends. This is only speculation, its only ever speculation because we don't know what happens, the only people who do have ended their journey and we will never know for sure till that journey actually ends. Your loved ones look at you and they say you lived a happy life and you are in a better place--whatever that is--and they look at you as if you were just born, as if birth and death are exactly the same thing and maybe they are. You come in not knowing what will happen they same way you leave, still waiting for that anticipation, as if we never really die and all I can say now is when I die I don't want a funeral I don't want an obituary or even a will because i'm still alive. It could be in your hearts, it could be in your mind, maybe there is a afterlife and when I do leave, I'll see you there. But when I die the ones who truly loved me will ask about where I have been my closest friends will ask first and when they receive the news they keep to themselves as if I was still alive because no one really dies, they stay in the thoughts of men


...and I'll set off into the dark.


With no place to rest my weary head


and everyone else waits,


as if they were all dying...


slowly.






Remember Me



Sunday, July 1, 2018

Luck and Faith

There is a time for luck and faith.
There is a time for greed and wealth. 
There is a time for the local economy. 
There is a time for truth and space. 

But sometimes it isn’t enough,
it isn’t even right. Not tonight. 
But sometimes it isn’t enough,
it isn’t even right. Not tonight. 

Day ends. 
The curtains draw. 
The lights are lit. 
Go home. 

There is a day for supplicant lives. 
There is a day for government bodies  
There is a day for luck and faith. 
There is a day but it is not this day. 

We fight till the end, 
even when the battles lost. 
Forget the cost. 
We fight till the end, 
even when the battles lost. 
Forget the cost. 

The drive home.
The crowds upset.
The dawn is coming. 
Go home. 

There is a way for newborn lives. 
There is a way for airborne lies. 
There is a way to get fat off hope. 
There is a way that life’s a joke. 

Failure comes in,
shapes and sizes. 
Failure comes in,
different horizons. 
Failure comes in,
replicant youth. 
Failure comes in,
a weaklings tool. 

A new day has come. 
We wont forget. 
It isn’t enough. 
Forget the cost. 




Remember me

Tuesday, June 26, 2018

Can You Hear Me Now?

I’m trying to fill this space,
I hope that you relate.
I’ve been trying to win this race,
I feel kind of out of place

Can you hear me now?
I’m somewhere somehow.
I try to make a step,
this is my last regret. 

I feel like a animal. 
Locked in a cage for some show.
I try to make things right. 
I don’t want to fight. 

The tank is getting low,
I don’t want to spend this now.
I think I’ll stay here to tonight,
I’ll see you some other night.

Will you see me then?
I think I need a friend. 
I stand on the outskirts now,
I need to be there for a while. 

Can you hear me now?
The air smells something fowl.
I can’t stand the half full mess. 
I can’t see past that’s left. 

I feel a wholesome mess. 
Maybe I’m just like the rest. 
I try to make things right. 
I don’t want to fight. 

Can you hear me now?
I’m somewhere somehow.
I try to make a step,
this is my last regret. 










Remember me

Wednesday, June 20, 2018

Wake Up The Dream Is Over

The little world in my palm,
the radio is on.
And if I believe what they say,
the whole damn world will be like me. 

My life is long enough just so. 
The little ducklings in a row. 
Life’s such an ignorant bliss. 
Flip the table, 
cock the pistol,
and feel my fist. 

The worlds mine. 

I’ll teach the reapers what they sow. 

The world is mine. 

The fishermen fisheries will learn from me. 

The world is mine. 

I’ll turn the slime into water and the water into wine. 

The people don’t understand. 
Why there’s a brand on my hand. 
In this dystopia. 
Everyone owns you. 

I get the facts from what I read. 
They tell me on the tv screens. 
I’m just another cog in the machine. 
But I know the world wishes they were me. 

I got a dirty little secret. 
And if I trust that you will keep it.
They have meeting every Tuesday at 5.
It’s time to blow something up 
and start a revolution by 9. 

The world is mine

They will have to be put together by glue. 

The world is mine. 

The ignition has been fired and it’s aiming at you. 

The world is mine. 

They don’t know what’s coming. 

The world is mine. 

The revolution is stunning. 

Has everyone found out?
The people are becoming now. 
Wake up, the dream is over. 

Has the leaders all run away?
I think we are here to stay. 
Wake up the dream is over. 

But what really was our plan?
We stuck it to the man. 
Wake up the dream is over. 

The man you will put at the head.
He is laughing over the dead. 
Wake up the dream is over. 

The past is found if you read it. 
I just done believe it. 
Wake up the dream is over. 

We became the new tyrant. 
Now the people rise up to fight it. 
Wake up the dream is over. 

The world is mine. 
Wake up the dream is over. 

The world will die. 
Wake up the dream is over. 









Remember me

Wednesday, June 13, 2018

My Song

Even then I see your blue eyes stop my falling. 
Now I know.
Even now your blue eyes caught me from my folly.
Now I know that each time I cry.
Why do I even lie?
You are my song.









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Friday, June 8, 2018

The Month of Madness

You're in luck! I am getting a lot of stuff together and am going to do a event on my blog that will be titled The Month of Madness! what is The Month of Madness? I know that I used to blog a lot and for a while I did not blog at all so I have a plan to pay it forward back to you by giving you a post every day for a entire month. In this Month of Madness you will get poetry, a new part to my short story The Crucible, drawings, a revised chapter to my novel and more stuff I have not done on my blog before. Its going to be awesome. Tell all your friends to keep their eyes on my blog because a lot of content is coming your way. I have not decided if I want it to be the start of next month or the month after but you will know soon enough. I'll keep you posted and spread the word!











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Wednesday, June 6, 2018

I Feel Guided By Myself

Momma caught me fighting with my shadow.
Father hit a herald times four.
I've learned the birds and bees.
So stay away from me.
I'll be sleeping in the hardwood floor.

A sentinel warns us of the sky.
Time and time again, 
I recover from misanthropy. 
Yet you wonder of the reason why.
Think we're going down, down, down. 

I feel guided by myself. 

All my friends on liquor street, 
want a piece of granite,
to firmly press underneath their gums.

I told a tale to understand, 
the meaning of the planet.
The chemical trails greeted me,
With their guns. 

And I’m sick of all the complications,
that you can’t seem to stop offering me. 
Everyone is rather bored of this situation.

I can’t stop what is being offered to me,
I feel guided by myself. 






Remember me