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Thursday, February 16, 2012

The Child: Entry 15

Have you read the preceding chapters?
If not then read it from the beginning
Read the preceding chapter...

The Beginning:

Previously on The Child:

It felt like a standing ovation, like an appreciation from the misguided to the misunderstood. Now that things are said and done, looking back at this, this was very well one of the most important events to affect my life to what it is now. The ever-sweet mother explained to me that though nothing will become of my charges against me I am not to be trusted.

So by the chance I am able to begin again with a new family, I was already an outcast, I guess this is how my life is supposed to be so I set that way for the rest of my life. As with the murder that was pinned on me, Ill tell you later when things begin to make more sense but for at that time, I was in the dark and so you should be too if you want to understand. 


I’m not a disturbed or even a complicated man but with everything that was presented to me, that’s all that I could feed off of. Through several days after my so claimed trial I got along with everyone just fine like before but they always looked over their shoulders when I was around. Like I was a deceptive flower just waiting to show you my rotting insides. It feels like that’s what we all really are; we all have a dark side. Its some primal state in which we loose control and we disobey but stick to the laws of nature—the question is just when. 

After everything was said and done after The Mother consulted me, Ville put his arm around me and congratulated me. I could only respond with a 'why?'—I felt like I was blackballed by the only thing I was holding on to—I’m sure that everyone knows how that is like at least to some degree. It’s depressing and you just have no more apparent hope. Ville became my light he mentioned that he could turn that all around, Ville and me got along very well after that point. He let me in on a couple secrets but he never mentioned anything about his eyes--maybe I was insane, that’s all I could wonder at the time. 


The Delacroix's Cube is some delicate artifact to The Family, from what I hear it has some unlimited potential to do many things. He didn't say what they were but he said I would find out eventually if I really was the aura it was looking for. Childlike... I look at everyone around me in this place and I feel that almost everyone else was more innocent than me but maybe it was how you looked at things and not what you do. You can see little children have tempered fits and throw things across the room but they are still childlike.

Maybe childlike is just not knowing but accepting it, when a child is just a few years old you don't hear them asking about how many rotations does a wheel to a vehicle take in a minute, its too complex. When you are older, you yearn for those things, knowledge is power but a child is accepting maybe that is what separates the young to the old. I don't know, I am only going to accept it right now, over time it will come to me. 


     Ville tells me that the family is barbaric and uncivilized but how the family lives and how I lived has always seemed civilized to me. I couldn't comprehend on how anything could be more civilized than what was presented at the moment and he just laughed at me. Ville was always vague; no questions could ever be answered when they were directed to him though it was satisfying enough. Through the ways that he talked everything felt so suave and fluid-like, just living in some carefree world but he also said that I should be worried about everything that I see, like it all was going to show me their decaying insides also.

Nothing should be trusted, not even yourself, but you have to if you want to move forward in this world, just don't let anything take a hold of you to long or else you could just loose your sanity—so trivial.

Next entry in The Child:

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